Jake's exposure to the culture...

I just want to clarify that Jake is doing good. He just calls it like it is so his e-mails may seem like he is struggling. If he was he would say so. He is just telling it like it is. This e-mail is awesome and he is doing great. Don't want to give anyone the wrong idea. Anyway here it is...

hola. sus cartas son bueno. yo qeiro hablar mas en español pero me español es no bueno. so that means im going to type the rest in english.first off i want to re-explain my food situation. its good now. i still only eat about one or two meals a dayt but thats good. we usually eat lunch at a members house. its always rice. i have went a month and everyday i have had rice. its just plain white rice. but sometimes they will put eggs or potatoes in it. its very bland but filling. and we usually eat sandwhiches or eggs or cereal at our house. which is actually like an apartment. and last week Elder vasques, a missionary in our district went on splits with the zone leader and we got Elder Morris. he is an american and was way cool. he has been out for 22 months and said that the first change is always the hardest. and also i have seen way to many boobs out here. we will be in a lesson and the girl will just whip it out toi breast feed. and we get stunned for a second and just continue. and we were sitting at the bus stop and the same thing happened to the woman across from us. but the worst by far was when a woman went up to bear her testimony in church. and she started to talk then she decided to breast feed the baby in her arms. so she popped it out and fed the baby and just continued like nothing happened. preatty crazy stuff in the land of uruguay. Mom and Dad dont take this out. i want people to share the scares with me. and did i tell you that i have two snakes. yeah!!! they are the two girls we first baptized. its not good. we will be teaching and all of the sudden we hear 'salmond' in a high pitched voice and its the snakes on their bikes. ahhhhh! and they are always flirting around us. its preatty bad and they don listen to us when we explain that is bad. and they are always telling me that they want my eyes. so i have recived the nick name 'Elder Slmond- guapo, capo, snaker' in our district. last p day it was so hot. we checked and it was 111 degrees and it was awesome... and then it cooled down because of a storm and then the wall of humidity hit and that was preatty bad too. but i heard in rivera, a part in uruguay, iis 120 degrees all summer long. yikes!! so these next couple of questions i really need you to answer please. Justin, my cousin, worked at lifetime with one of my buddies in the CCM, his name is aaron alvey. he is really tall, but only for a month or two. can you ask justin if he knows him? and also one of my teachers in the CCM, Moises Cruz, was in the same mission as seth at the same time. could you ask seth if he remebers him? and last i want a list of possible souvenirs you all want, including grandma and grandpa, just in case i run into something you want. and can you include your clothes sizes and shoe size. but the shoes are measured diffrently here so could you convert it to south american standards. thanks... and me and my companion have 3 more people we are baptizing this saturday. there names are nicol, aldana, and mauro. we would be baptizing the parents of nichol and aldana, but they need to get married first, which is going to be soon. and we planned for the parents baptized in march. and i am probably going to go to the temple with them in a year. yea!! and dad tell the uruguayans at your work 'vamos arriba' for me.they will love you for it. thanks

Con amor, Elder Salmond-guapo, capo, snaker